Who this Kolaveri Di?

I just thought what would be the fate of this soup song if it were born in someone else's head:

If Himesh composed and sang:
The lyrics would be very less, only first few lines repeated 59 times in 4 mins.
There would be 7 versions of the song, remix, reprise (i dont know what this is), female, sad (?), the HR mix, and whatever-sounds-like-a-song version......

Anu Malik: Would make Atif Aslam sing in Sufi style... and copy it for the next album.

RGV: Video would start with shadows, and after 2 minutes the audio would start, shot in the beach and released in 3 languages and called the bhoot song.

Javed Akthar: It would have sounded different....leave it, we would not understand it anyway.

AR Rahman: Hmmm..it would have been rejected by Subhash Ghai, released for some Hollywood Harry Potter movie called the 'magical soup song' and would have won an oscar.

Karan Johar: A duet with Shahrukh Khan and himself and called 'KSouper boys song'

Last but not the least if sung by RAJNIKANTH:
The song would be the national anthem of India and Japan!!!

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